Vegas - The real story

Ok, the cat's out of the bag. Although the photos from my previous post about my Vegas adventure were legit, we did not actually have such a traumatic experience as I attempted to portray. The following is a more realistic report on my adventure.

Our real rental car (4 wheels=no extra charge)
Our legit hotel was the Boardwalk. It is conviently located beside a CVS and Hotel New York, New York. We spent the first night in a "smokers room" which almost ruined the trip. It was foul! Everything stunk. However, the very next day they moved us to a non-smoking room which was really nice. In fact, the room had been renovated quite nicely. My sister and I both really don't like clowns (why? I don't know, we just don't). So we were very amused that we selected the only hotel on the Vegas strip that had a friggen enormous clown head affixed to the building.
While in Vegas we only caught one show, but it was so worth it. We saw Zumanity, by Cirque Du Solel. It was incredible!Dressed as we are in the above photo, my sister and I descended the elevator to the hotel lobby. When we boarded the elevator, we made the acquaintance of a man who was probably 24 years of age. I must note that he had a strange resembelance to the comedian, Patton Oswalt. He was wearing some rock concert shirt that seemed to have been washed at least 15 times, but just not in the recent past.

Anyway, he opened the dialogue with "So, where are you two headed all dressed up?"
Kat explained that we had tickets to see Zumanity.
Patton replies, "Oh, that's cool. You should also check out the shows at the Excalibur Hotel. They have real combat with Medieval weapons!"
Me - "Oh, thats neat. Isn't that the place you eat with your hands while you watch the show?" (snicker)
Patton - Excitedly "Yeah! Its really cool. You should go tonight, they serve huge Turkey legs!"
Kat (strict vegatarian) - "Ok, thanks." Continues to make her escape with Patton in pursuit.

Anyway, its very easy to make friends in Vegas.

Vegas definetly is a great place to walk around and blend in. The Wynn Hotel, lame as it appears outside, is amazing on the inside. Total decadence.

In my previous Vegas post, I mentioned how well my sister and I get along. As a result, she takes every opportunity to embarrass me when she can. A few hours before our flight home, we stopped at Baja Fresh for lunch. The place was super busy; present were business women and men, about 8 firemen, countless students from UNLV, etc. Once I mentioned to her that I was really sad that the trip was going to be over soon and that I would not get to see her again for a few months. At the top of her lungs in a pained voice she exclaimed "Are you breaking up with me?!" Holy smokes, I felt like EF Hutton! The place went completely silent, all eyes were on me, and I just slithered down into my seat. Thankfully, business returned to normal as quickly as it had seized to a halt. Bitch, I owe you big for that one.

Unfortunately, I am running out of steam to write this evening. In closing, I leave you with the best quotes and observations that came from my journey to Sin City.

Best bumper sticker – “Driver carries no cash. He’s married.”

Best place to see a hooker – Ceaser’s Palace. We overheard a young lady talking "business" with three males. She was explaining how she normally charges $300 for one, but she was only going to charge them $350 for three. Vegas is full of bargins! These boys looked like Pavlov's Dogs, and she had just rung the dinner bell.

Best Vegas style casino advertisement – “Bikini Bull Riding”, Cold Beer… Dirty Girls. Mud Wrestling.” Refer to photo in last Vegas post.

Best quote - “I look so good, I should spank myself.” I will let you imagine who came up with that one.

Best inquiry while touring the Vegas Strip at 3 AM - "Where are all the beautiful people?"
Best answer to that question - "Beautiful people are at the club; not walking the strip."

Good night!

DcLc